The word ‘GURU’ means a whole world to most of us. It is a word that is so awe-inspiring. It gives us hope where there is hopelessness, faith, where there is no scope, literally, for improvement, and trust, as in, the ability to trust someone completely. But, the question lies in identifying that special person as a guru, in our lives. How do we even find that Guru who will help us excel in yoga, meditation and spirituality? Or, to sum it, what qualities embody a person who is fit to be a Guru?
To find a true Guru, we need to look at his or her traits. First, he or she needs to possess certain qualities and attitudes that are meant to be uniquely for a Guru. They are people who inspire, encourage, motivate and identify the pupil’s characteristic traits in minutes. In this manner, they also give the followers the much needed impetus to excel, banking on his or her strengths. The best way to march forward would be to enhance our strengths and make them the foundation stone. But in order to know what our strengths are, we need a Guru who can help us hone our latent talents and skills.
Who is a true Guru?
In India, from where the word originated, as well as in the whole world, it means you have finally found the anchor that will help you find the support for yourself. A true Guru empathizes with us and our situation. (We wrote an article on healthy empathy and how to nurture it. Your relationships are worth checking it out.)
It is the Guru, who will add invaluable insights to enhance your life. In the days gone by, the Guru encapsulated a superior person, highly evolved, and one who could address your needs in all the aspects or areas. But, as times have sped by, we see that we have started to multitask in our lives. This being the case, we need a Guru in each area, to help us acquire mastery and expertise in those facets. Today, we need a guru for fitness, a guru for academics, basically we need a guru for anything that we choose to study. Aside from yoga, meditation and spirituality, we also need a guru to address our emotional health.
In the days gone by, there was a lot of stress on the importance of getting a guru
That is why, in the days gone by, in ancient times, there was a lot of stress on the importance of getting a Guru. Nothing ever bordered on the aspects of monetary returns. When parents took their child, especially the sons to the cottages (that housed the dwelling of the Guru and his family, as well as the school), they took it for granted that the Guru would be instrumental in bringing the child up, building his personality, helping him get a unique character, all instilled by the great Guru. It was the norm, the tradition, a regular aspect, to excel and grow in this manner. The Guru teaches us a very important thing- that of mindfulness.
(If you’re familiar with mindfulness, and you don’t feel it resonates with what you need, it’s okay! Please know that there are many who feel the same. So, take a look at our article on embodied mindfulness, a relatively new direction which is quite promising.)
The Guru and his wife would play the roles of the disciple’s parent too
The parents had to leave the child under the tutelage and the home care of the Guru and his wife, who would play the roles of the disciple’s parents too. Today, in these modern times, it has become increasingly difficult to identify who the Guru is. Choosing a Guru is a tedious task, given the capricious nature of people today. People would look more into the economics part of it- they would try to cut corners and select a guru who would cost them less.
But the most important aspect is to get a Guru who thinks of the well-being of the students rather than thinking of his own self. The first and foremost quality that one should look for, in a Guru, is that of unconditional love, for the students. The right Guru is the one who can say things with firmness, with the good in the mind, instead of saying things with harshness. There are other traits to identify in a Guru. A Guru should also try to have excellent knowledge and be one who knows how to transfer that knowledge to his students. He Guru teaches his students how to develop good self- esteem. This self-esteem is what lays the foundation for a perfect self-worth aspect in later years. T
(To learn more about how to develop healthy self-esteem and open your third chakra as the same time, head over here. We’ve included lots of practical tips to help you get there.)
The qualities that make a Guru
In a small survey conducted in a yoga class, we asked the students what they would choose as important qualities in a Guru. They unanimously said that they wanted a Guru who was non-judgmental. Also, they wanted one who has excellent knowledge about the yoga asanas, mudras and pranayama and their therapeutical applications. They also reiterated that a true Guru would know how to teach each one in a specific and customised manner, despite teaching them in a group. That is the art of teaching everyone.
A student, Rama, said that she would attribute the highest level of integrity to a person who is capable of being called a Guru. Integrity and credibility are special traits. They cannot be found in everyone. If a person has it, then one day, he or she is bound to shine as a Guru, meant to lead the groups of students from darkness unto light, giving them the much-needed invaluable insights. Imbibing these insights is important for one to shine and build character.
But how does one identify a true teacher or a spiritual master, one who is fit to lead us? A true Guru is an amalgamation of his thoughts, words, deeds, actions and conduct. He or she has to show the path to everyone. The Guru’s way of living should be an inspiration for people and they must venerate the Guru from the heart, with complete respect and sincerity. These feelings come out or get expressed, only when the Guru appears as one who is worthy of being respected. The Guru’s way of everyday living should be so pure that it becomes a veritable topic of veneration.
Looking for the right Guru is always an eternal quest
When we are on the lookout for that perfect Guru who is going to be elusive to most of us, unless there’s a predestined connect for it to happen, it never will. We will always be looking for our Guru- for yoga, for meditation, for pranayama and for spirituality. That is going to be an eternal quest, unless the qualities of the Guru attract him or her magnetically. First of all, there are also some ‘don’ts’ that will help us identify that the person we are contemplating on making as our prospective Guru is not Guru material at all.
So, what are these?
It is said that a true Guru or teacher is one who has stellar qualities; yes, we know that. Let us look at what a Guru should not do- the ideal Guru will not be judgmental. They will not admonish a student in front of all. They should never compare any student to anyone else. An ideal teacher knows that each student‘s capability is unique. One cannot be compared to anyone else, as each one is different. The ideal teacher knows that in his or her heart. The ideal teacher is also one who exercises a great deal of patience. They are willing to give their student the benefit of doubt. They do not jump to conclusions. And they also give allowances to the students to assimilate everything at their own pace. That is the hallmark of a great teacher.
One who is blemishless and spotless in the region of understanding the capabilities of his or her student. The true teacher makes us feel at home. They do not get angry by becoming short-tempered and volatile. The true teacher is dispassionate in his overview of the world, that is the world of students. The teacher does not turn reactive and get mad at the students for his or her lack of understanding of concepts or lessons in everyday life. It is a very lucky student who is able to establish an excellent rapport with the teacher. And the power of understanding is in the hearts of both the parties involved.
A true Guru is multi-faceted
There are teachers, Gurus, tutors, Facilitators, Academicians, yoga experts, spiritual masters, mentors, spiritual advisor. These are multifaceted roles adopted by the teacher. In a true sense, a person who is important for us for yoga, meditation and spirituality as a divine guru embodies values. They are an amalgamation or a perfect blend of emotions that help the students to love the Guru. They need to have the qualities that show us that the Guru is a spiritually evolved soul, speaks nothing but the absolute truth, and also knows that the truth sometimes hurts the other person. Hence, the truth has to be declared at times, when only the person who has to hear it should be present.
When admonishing the student happens only in the best interests of the student, then we know that the person who embodies these qualities is that special person who is worthy of being called a Guru or Teacher. Perhaps in the days gone by, or in ancient times, life itself was less complicated. There were no lifestyle problems and issues that complicate living. Today, the world has shrunk in size, and people can meet anyone albeit virtually. Despite that, we seem to have become more difficult to approach, for the others. But, as far as the true Guru is concerned, we must remember that the true Guru may be initially elusive, but, as things begin to fall into place, we need to know that no one can take away the rightful place of a Guru or a Sadguru.
How to know your quest to find your guru is complete
Our ancestors always felt that there was a voice in the heads of people that gave them good counsel when asked. This is what we call as that gut feeling that one has. It depends on the wisdom that the intuition of a person has. Today, the same role of the Guru is somewhat different. The Guru is a specialised person, and can handle many things, as the times have also changed. Now, the Guru can advise on the importance of physical events, behavioral sciences, our actions and also emotional issues. The Guru is a person who dons many hats – in yoga, meditation, and also spirituality. The Guru is the new age’s ready-reckoner and the go-to person for everything.
Our forefathers also believed that our destiny is a dynamic thing. If we are in a terrible need for a Guru, then the Universe will orchestrate a chance encounter between the students and the Guru, in a very magical manner. This is called fate. When you meet this person, you will know that your quest to find your guru has ended.
If a person has wonderful and stellar qualities, and we feel drawn towards him or her due to those qualities, and look up to them for those very same values, then we have manage to find our guru. He or she is kind and compassionate towards not only the students, but also towards others. A true Guru shows unconditional love and care for the students, irrespective of the student’s attitude. If he or she forgives easily and interacts like a friend, then he is a true Guru. These are the traits through which a person can find his or her Guru.
However, be aware that not all gurus are good and mean you well. Many have come to misuse and abuse their title, so head over here to learn more about situations when gurus have gone bad or criminal and how to recognize them.
Shanti Arunkumar, Senior Contributor At L’Aquila Active
Learn more about Shanti by reading her bio below.
Click on link below to meet L’Aquila Active’s entire team of experts, including university degrees, certifications, and credentials on yoga and meditation: